Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Animal Ratings: Idolomantis Diabolica

I usually talk about philosophy/religion/politics, but when I don't, I like to talk about animals. There are WAY too many cool animals with WAY too many cool abilities--it would be impossible for anyone to fully appreciate or understand them all. That is why learning about animals is an adventure that will last a lifetime.

Here is how I will rate animals in this post, and in future posts about animals: All animals are rated on a scale from 1-10, where 1 is the mosquito and 10 is the mantis shrimp, the dumbest and coolest of all animals, respectively.

I recently purchased an Idolomantis diabolica, or Giant Demon Flower Mantis. I realized I could get one for only $30, and immediately threw my money at my computer. The tank and food and such cost way more, but by the time I realized that, my mantis was already being overnighted.

Sorry for the video quality on this one, but here is me unpacking my mantis.

When he arrived, he was just a nymph, so the crickets I had for him were too big to eat. Fortunately, I was able to catch a fly by hand while standing in line at Chipotle.

He earned his name, Wakizaka Yasuharu (the name of the eldest of the Seven Spears of Shizugatake, the elite samurai bodyguards of Katsuie Shibataby), by defeating his first fly.

Here is his stalking his prey, like a leaf on the wind.

After patiently imitating a leaf in the most terrifying way imaginable, he strikes.

Giant Demon Flower Mantises are very, very cool. I rate them at an impressive 9.5/10, based on their many abilities, having (objectively) the best name of any animal, and their general coolness. They have thousands of spears on their forearms, awesome eyesight, super-stealth, and color changing abilities. Also, they look like a leaf, and sway as though being blown by the wind to further camouflage their murderous intent. They get a +0.5 bonus for being mantises (similar to how lizards get a +0.5 bump purely for being lizards).

No comments:

Post a Comment